I still don’t like speaking of it, of this fear, I don’t want people to become intrusive about me. I don’t want the worry of people who don’t understand because they’ve never felt this way.
As they walked away the baby girl watched me and smiled and then started giggling with joy. As if our encounter had tickled her as much as it did me.
Lying so often feels like the easy way out, but I’ve been learning the hard way that honesty is the only way to face demons and beat them. To learn from the shit in life and to handle the pain of the world, to see the good things and not just the bad.
There is a lot of value in talking about survival and moving forward in life. It is important to see what the future can hold, but when you feel alone in the thick of sorrow the only thing that you want is to feel less alone.
If you are hopeless, want to give up, or are contemplating suicide. Please take a minute to read this and call someone. You aren’t alone. You don’t have to go through this feeling alone. You are stronger than you know and more incredible than you believe.
From a young age, I learned that writing about my pain was like talking to a friend. My journal has traveled as far and wide as I have.